When I was preparing to launch my blog last year, I was having a difficult time
overcoming a tremendous amount of fear and doubt.
As I poured over God’s promises of provision for me ( see this post),
I would regain peace, but quickly lose it within hours.
Then God made His way to my heart from a completely different angle.
In my Bible reading one morning, I read the familiar verse stating our greatest commandment.
Thou shalt love the Lord thy God
with all thy heart,
and with all thy soul,
and with all thy mind.
Matthew 22:37
I realized that by not trusting God, I wasn’t loving Him with all of my heart, soul and mind.
He showed me I was not being
His true friend.
We have permission from scripture to call Him our friend.
Ye are my friends,
if ye do whatsoever I command you.
Henceforth I call you not servants;
for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth:
but I have called you friends;
for all things that I have heard of my Father
I have made known unto you.
John 15:14-15
God began using this facet of our relationship (friendship) to help me look at my fear in a different way.
God reminded of a scenario in my past when I had made something for a job I was
doing and my co-worker, (who I consider a friend) questioned me saying “Are you sure you made that?”
She probably didn’t realize what she had done, but she had just called me a liar.
I tried to remember if I had ever behaved in a way that betrayed her trust.
Why was this friend doubting my character?
Hadn’t I proven myself to be trustworthy?
Her questioning and doubt felt like a betrayal to our friendship.
I believe God was wanting me to understand
that when I doubt His provision and His faithfulness,
I am like this friend.
Has God ever behaved in a way to betray our trust?
Has he ever lied to us?
Has He ever been anything less than who He says He is?
God is not a man, that he should lie,
neither the son of man, that he should repent:
hath he said, and shall he not do it?
Or hath he spoken, and shall not make it good?
Numbers 23:19
We are not honoring who He is when we don’t trust Him to be faithful to His promises.
We can’t be loving Him with all our heart, soul and mind when are treating Him like a liar.
God was gentile with me as He spoke to my heart.
He saw that while I was claiming scripture about what He could do for me, (see this post)
I was still wavering in His rest.
So God lovingly highlighted how I was hurting our friendship so that He could help me gain peace in my trial.
He showed me that my doubt
was a contradiction of my love and devotion.
He also showed me that my doubt
was a personal attack on our friendship.
I cherish my relationship with the Lord.
God knew if He could get me focused on our fellowship, not just His provision,
it would make me want to stop fearing and doubting so I could love Him more.
I love Him more by being a true friend,
not by doubting His provision and not by letting fear replace His peace.
I believe all the scripture I used to overcome my fear was valuable and I needed
to meditate on all of it, but in His desire for our relationship to be beautiful, God showed me
this piece that was missing. This “personal” piece of our friendship.
He is worthy of our devotion. He is worthy of our trust.
We can consider Him our truest Friend.
Friendship is a two way street.
We need to be true friends to God. This is not possible if we are treating Him as a liar.
If we allow our doubt and fear to remain, despite His continual promises of peace, we
are not trusting Him. This breaks fellowship. Remember, He is faithful that promised.
Knowing that fear and doubt keep us from loving Him fully is great motivation to overcome them!
Life is not just about believing His promises,
but understanding how believing His promises
draws us closer to Him, allowing us to fulfill His great
command of loving Him with all we are.
LEARN how to become God’s child.
LISTEN to my newest playlist on YouTube.
SEE all blog posts.
CONTACT Jennifer.